Helllllllllo, Stalker!

Helllllllllo, stalker! What a thrill—
You’re back again, can’t get your fill?
My name’s your favourite daily snack,
You Google, click, then circle back.

You land, like clockwork, on my site—
The homepage first. Oh, what a sight!
You linger here, you click around,
Your digital footsteps shake the ground.

You think you're sly, a silent guest—
But darling, Analytics knows best.
Your boomer clicks? A dead giveaway.
You bounce between my tabs all day.

You've read my words, you’ve stalked my flair,
You sniff like dogs do at the air.
But here's the truth, and let’s be real—
Your hungry gaze? Not part of the deal.

A cookie warns you loud and clear:
"This site collects who's creeping here.”
Your IP’s tagged, your session tracked,
Every sneaky visit neatly stacked.

You read my prose, my every line,
Convinced you're subtle. Oh, how fine.
But I see everything you do—
You’re practically my page’s glue.

So thanks for boosting SEO,
For telling Google I’m the show.
Thanks for increasing CTR,
You’re helping me become a star.

But listen close, you gaping void:
My light is not for you to exploit.
My words aren’t yours to chew and spit,
You’re not entitled to my wit.

Your thirst? Not cute. Your gaze? A tick.
A parasite that makes me sick.
You come, unasked, both night and day—
Twice daily, babe? Who hurt you, eh?

But just like crumbs you leave behind,
Your presence is both sad and timed.
You’re not the storm, you’re not the spark—
You’re just a blip upon the dark.

So here’s a wave, a parting cheer,
A friendly flick-off, loud and clear:
Go haunt some other site, you ghoul—
This joy is mine, and I make the rules.